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Cigar reviews are like as assh@les, everyone has one. However, unlike the many ones you may read that talk about how much spice, pepper or if they taste nuts or something else dumb within the reviews, I share what I like to call a “no shit” cigar review.

 

I’ve been smoking stoags for about 20 years. Am I an expert? No, I just have smoked a shit ton of stoags and can give you some insight on them so if you want to try one, hopefully my unique reviews will guide you a bit since I happen to get allot of questions on cigars.

This week’s cigar is the CAO flathead Steel Horse Bullneck Gordo (ya got to love the name as it sends chills down many crybaby weekend warriors spines as they see it at the cigar store.)

This beast is a 6.5×66 cigar, What the hell does that mean? To avoid confusion, it is easier to refer to a cigar’s length and width to describe its size (I get that allot). The length is measured in inches, while the width is measured by ring gauge, which is the diameter expressed in 64ths of an inch. Confusing? Not really.  Check out the below pic of sizes of cigar ring size to give you a better idea.

Ring_size_chart

Is one size bigger than another? (giggle) It’s all personal preference but size may matter. But so help me baby Jesus, if I see you walking around with one of those straw looking things you refer to as a cigar, I’m going to demand you “man card” on the spot. Don’t be that guy. Any chick doing this is valid within the Geneva Convention as anytime a lady burns a stoag its classified waaaay above Top Secret, more in the “sooo hot” category”

Cigars are made to be enjoyed. Many think they must enjoy one only while sipping expensive whiskey or the like. Bullshit, hell I enjoy one as soon as my feet hit the bedroom floor out of bed as I walk to get my dark black coffee. Anytime is a good time to enjoy a cigar.

Cigar Brand: CAO flathead Steel Horse Bullneck Gordo

Size: 6.5×66  (6.5 is the length & 66 is the ring gauge)(a little smaller in diameter than a 50 cent coin) Nice!!

Individual cost: If you pay over $6 for this you are getting hosed. Box price here

Is this a good cigar to drive a M1A1 tank with? I’m pretty sure it’s almost required, however, if you don’t have a tank, it would be perfect to enjoy in the DC Memorial mall as it provides ample cigar smoke to disrupt any cry baby protest that may be conducted at the time. (from experience)

What’s it like to smoke it? This isn’t the cigar you want to walk in and buy for one of your first cigars unless you want to vomit on an ant hill later. If you wear Izod polo shirts, listen to Justin Beiber or don’t have calluses on your hands, don’t even pick it up. This is one to try after you have tried a dozen or so stoags and you have gotten use to them or buy it right out of the chute and let the party begin. Your call!  It burns nice and it taste like freedom. Not “nuts” or a “bit of spice” or other non-man card holding descriptions. It’s a good cigar and rates in the “full” category but I have found as I’ve smoked it all the way down to where it burns my fingers it tends to fall apart(not good). I like to describe it as a light mule kick to the chest flavor. If you have some chow in your gut it will even taste better but I have enjoyed one of these baby’s while digging three feet deep railroad tie holes in the sun with post hole diggers and didn’t die. Challenge accepted!

Good occasions to smoke it: Mother in laws house, church parking lot, driving a M1 like stated above and at the horse races or simply chilling on your porch. It’s also ideal to chew on in your office cubicle to keep the “office idiots” away from you. They can’t handle that much freedom at once. Usually moms are pulling their kids closer to them as they pass a guy smoking one of these as he has a worn leather jacket on next to a Harley with a beard and has “I really don’t want to talk to you” written all over his face.

What should I drink with it? Milk, didn’t your mother always tell you to drink your milk? But, you can enjoy some nice Jack Daniels or even coffee with it. Some fufu cigar reviewers say it enhances the taste. I say it enhances the freedom! Lots of freedom!!!

 

All in all this is a tasty cigar that “if” you enjoy cigars you will enjoy this one. However, if this going to be your first cigar, try something else. The last thing any cigar smoker wants is for beginners to try a mean cigar, hate it and never smoke them again because they emptied their chow in the neighbors front yard.

I would rate this cigar: (4 out of 5 )

  Ratings

 

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