It all began as www.anysoldier.com conducted their first Motorcycle rally.
What had planned on being a quick flight to StLouis from the all mighty Washington DC turned into the over burner weekend and flight from hell.  (IF YOU MISSED THIS RALLY, YOU CAN ALWAYS DONATE TO ANYSOLDIER ANYTIME!)

I arrived at the airport at 0400 (who goes to airport this early?) then hung around until the pencil neck at US Scareways (oops US Airways) told me at 0600 that my flight was canceled due to crew rest. OK, I m cool with non sleepy pilots flying, especially since I will be crashed out on the plane but may just by chance could they have freaking told me this at the love of god 0400???  Then I could have got on one of two other flights to St Louis. Nope. Just pencil neck telling me that I can have my ticket refunded or go to Pittsburg (yuk) and sit for 6 hours then go to St Louis. (dear US Airways, you suck).

I thought hum, how about I beat you into a pulp until you get a rested crew to fly all of us who were here at 0400 to St Louis? So then I called Marty at AnySoldier and I felt like I had to tell him his dog died. I felt like crap as the AnySoldier rally was kicking off and they held up for yours truly…..I felt like an assbag! Thanks again US shitways. So as I sat trying to get a little sleepy sleep, the airport big mole haired toilet cleaning lady decided to sit next to me and spill out here life story. Seriously, I looked above my head to see if some ass hat put a “Tell this guy your worldly problems before you kill yourself” sign over me.

Finally after 6 hours of hell, my flight was called. “Boarding section 5” (I was section 1) as I nearly pushed my way onto the airplane with the cleaning lady following me spewing something about money that she needed……..

Walking off the plane about 20 feet I ran into “Taco” thats LtCol Taco for you that didn’t know and Taylor Batten aka “Gunny” and it was a great surprise.  Enjoy a big cigar and cruise through some of my old posts to get to know them both.  As I changed clothes damn near in the middle of the USO at the airport, we were on a beautiful 2007 Harley Fat Boy donated by “Docs Harley Davidson” http://www.docsharleydavidson.com/. Then we began to ride until……..it rained and kept raining. For the love of god the skies opened (that cleaning lady had something to do with this) but after it let up a bit (not) we pushed through it and dried out in about 10 miles.

With, Harry, Leon, Kriss,Taco and Marty cruising in a pack, the day couldn’t get any better. Thank you all who went above and beyond to make this all happen, Marty, Sue, Della, Terry, Wentzville Police (great guys), everyone at “Docs”, the entire Batten family and everyone else that gave a crap to make a difference, you did!  The day ended with a great BBQ and AnySoldier coming out on top once again. P.S if you see my butt on the road, I need it. Maj Pain


  1. Yay! Sounds like great fun 🙂 And you got to see Taylor again — how kewl is that?!
    Sounds like a great time was had by all, despite the rain.

  2. Pain – the Church Ladies felt it imperative that a guardian angel accompany you on your journey. Our beloved mole lady won the short straw.
    You’re welcome.

  3. Sorry you had so much pain, Maj! heh I feel the same way about 0400! The mole lady must’ve thought you were real compassionate! 😉 Good of you and Taco and everyone else to do this!

  4. Ok all, don’t let the Major fool ya….he talked about the mole lady a few times, we think he must have secretly enjoyed their time together!!!!
    It was a wonderful weekend and a great honor to be amoung such great people as Lt. Col. Bell, the Major, Marty and his family and the rest of the awesome people that came out to help support anysoldier.
    We learned how to get the waitress to get stuff to you like RIGHT NOW when Major Pain speaks! LOL
    Taylor’s feet haven’t touched the ground yet!

  5. Come on now, you had a great time. How come you didn’t fly Taco’s airline? You probably saved the cleaning lady’s life, too as I’m sure you were appropriately sympathetic. Saving another life in the U.S.A. no less and a Happy day with your favorite friends, you really can’t complain and get alot of sympathy from me.

  6. You didn’t call ahead? Dumb jarhead. You’ll never make it in the business world. How about going ahead and springing some of that phony BS tough guy bunk at the next check-in counter, mouth? You’ll be behind bars and have a size 11 arshole by dinner time, guaranteed. You are nothing but a fat-rumped keyboard pounder.

  7. I’d pay a thousand bucks to see the Major and Tom meet. On second thought, maybe those bucks would be more useful as a donation to AnySoldier. Yeah, that’s it.
    Tom, don’t be a girly man. Step up to the plate and make a donation for those who protect your freedom. Thank-you.

  8. There are many things I could use to describe Major Pain, not once though did ‘fat rumped key board pounder’ ever enter my mind!!!
    Wonder just how big Tom’s ole cajones would be should he see the Major in person?! Now that is an amusing thought!!

  9. Tom-
    Its guys like you I really had to shake my head at while I was fighting insurgents twice as smart. Then again, Im fighting for you as well. Isn’t it a great country?

  10. Really? No threats for me jarhead? When you call people working for a living behind ticket counters names and make threats. You cannot convince anybody you joined the military for anybody but your own sick ego. Screw you.

  11. OK Major – here’s an idea for another fund raiser – you and girlie girl Tom M going a couple of rounds. Nah…he’s probably run away crying before we could see any action.
    Hey Tom, you a ticket/gate agent for US Air or what?
    Major – so glad to hear the bike rally was a success. Kudos to all those who made it happen.

  12. Tom Macky???
    I think that’s the idiot that screwed up my flight as well in Detroit. Tom you are a ticket agent aren’t you? You better go assign some seats and try to get it right next time instead of looking at blogs.

  13. Maybe there’s an anger management class at Tom’s place of employment he can take. I can’t imagine him traxking down all the unhappy travelers who come thru the airport to chew them out! He must be busy!

  14. Glad you were able to make it to MO! I love the pix on the website and am incredibly jealous. Would have loved to have been there. Have got to finish organizing a ride here in SC. To go riding with my oldest bro, Taco, and Maj Pain…..

  15. The irony of it all is that Maj Pain spent time away from his family and friends to defend the very freedoms that Tom Mackey abuses; freedom of speech, however lame his speech might be. What is even sadder is he (Tom Mackey)will never know what it means to be a true warrior like Maj Pain. Those qualities include compassion, bravery and commitment to our country. Maj Pain, it is my honor and pleasure to call you my friend.
    Sue Horn

  16. Sounds like a great time had by all!Well after the plane ride!In Vt they had a missle fall of the wing of an F-16 waiting to take off,now that could of been a real bad flight!Everything is grounded till they figure that one out!Who left the asshat gate open,round up that stray mackey!God bless the anysoldier foundation and all who serve..Semper Fi

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